Are You Too Hard on Yourself?
Learning something new is often uncomfortable because we are stepping out of our comfort zone. Whether it is learning a new skill, a new habit or how to be a better version of ourselves, there is always a learning curve. During this time, we feel lost, incompetent, pathetic and even shameful. Struggling at something new is very human and perfectly normal. It takes time to build new skills and we are allowed to give ourselves that time. But how often do we set ourselves up for failure and disappointment by having unattainable expectations? How often do we torture ourselves by not being allowed to make mistakes or be human in our learning process?
"Perfectionism is a dangerous state of mind in an imperfect world." -R. Hillyer.
Let's allow ourselves the freedom of making mistakes and being imperfect. We are not a failure if it is difficult. We are a beginner and we are learning. I have been guilty of torturing myself more times than I can count.
"Perfectionism is self-abuse of the highest order" A. Wilson Schaef.
I have been struggling with perfectionism ever since I was a child. I often sabotage myself with my unrealistic expectations, my fear of making a mistake and not being perfect or my restlessness and impatience. It has had a very negative impact on my life and my self-esteem and it has lead to proscratination, chronic anxiety and feeling like a failure. I am my own worst enemy but I am also the one holding the key. Before we start torturing ourselves over torturing ourselves, I will invite you to recite with me the ho'oponopono mantra I shared yesterday, to forgive ourselves for any shortcomings and to be compassionate with the beginner that we are.